Ubuhlungu Buyinto Yendalo, Kodwa Ayigxina
Abazali abaninzi baziva bexhalabile xa umntwana efunyaniswa ukuba ene-autism. Ngokuqhelekileyo, intlungu idibene nomoya wokulahleka. Nangona umntwana wabo, eqinisweni, useyingxenye yobomi babo, abanye abazali banomuzwa wokuthi baphulukane nomntwana ababekulindele, okanye umntwana abacinga ukuba banako. Abanye bayabuhlungu ngenxa yokuqonda ukuba umntwana wabo nge-autism ngokuqinisekileyo uya kuhlala ubomi babo bonke ngokukhubazeka.
Kanti abanye bayabuhlungu ngenxa yengcamango yokuba abayi kuba nako ukunika umlingane okanye abazali ukuba babe nesipho somntwana "ogqibeleleyo" okanye umzukulu.
Nangona intlungu iyenzeka kubazali abaninzi, izazi zeengqondo zikaCindy Ariel noRobert Naseef zibonelela ngeendlela zokulawula nokuze zitshathise intlungu.
Ukusuka kuDkt. Cindy Ariel: Iphupha elitsha Iingubo kunye nokugubha imihlali entsha
Kukho ilahleko ezininzi ebomini, kwaye kubonwa ngombono omkhulu, ilahleko nganye ifaka intsingiselo nokujula ebomini bethu. Sonke siziva sibuhlungu kwiindawo ezahlukeneyo ebomini bethu kodwa oko akunciphisi ixesha lethu lonwabo novuyo. Enyanisweni, intlungu iphakamisa uvuyo ngenxa yokuba uvuyo luhle kakhulu emva kokudabuka.
Njengoko siza kwamkela apho abantwana bethu bekhona kunye nokuba ngubani abo, siphupha amaphupha amatsha kubo kunye nakwiintsapho zethu kwaye la maphupha amatsha anakho amathuba okusekelwe kwizinto eziyinyani kwaye ngoko ke zinokwenzeka ukuba zifumaneke.
Xa sasike siphupha malunga nokuba neengxoxo zefilosofi nomntwana wethu, ngoku sinokulangazelela ukuva ukubiza kuthi unina okanye ubaba okanye uthi ndikuthande ... kanye kanye. Amaphupha ethu kufuneka ashiye ukuthetha xa umntwana ethetha ngokupheleleyo kwaye agxininise ekuboneni kwakhe kwamehlo ethu. Xa iinjongo ezintsha ezinjalo zifikile, kuyavuya ngokwenene.
Oku akuthethi ukuba ngamanye amaxesha asifuni okanye silangazelela umntwana esicinga. Xa sigxininisa khona, sinokuhlala sivakalelwa.
Ukuphupha amaphupha amatsha nokuvuya kwiinjongo ezintsha kusinceda sibe nolonwabo ngakumbi nomntwana esinayo. Akukho mntu ufuna ukuba kukho ubunzima obuza kubahlela abantwana babo. Singaziva sidaniwe, sinetyala, kwaye sibuhlungu xa umntwana wethu enomngeni oza kwenza ubomi, obunzima kunzima, nangakumbi. Sibhekana nobunzima kwaye sibathanda abantwana bethu njengoko sibuhlungu kwaye sibhiyozela ubomi babo obuhlukile kunye nexesha esinikezelwa ukuba sibe kunye.
Ukusuka kuDkt. Robert Naseef: Zinike ixesha lokulila, ukuphulukisa, kwaye wamkela
Intlungu ingafika kumaza kwaye inokuthabatha indawo ongalindelekanga ukuba uyihambe. Yinto eqhelekileyo kunye nemvelo, ezayo kwaye iya. Okokuqala qaphela ukuba awukho yedwa kule nto kwaye ukuba iimvakalelo zakho ezenza i-gamut kwesoyiko, inecala, intukuthelo, kunye nokudandatheka kukuba ngokwenene impawu zentliziyo ephukileyo. Ngoko qhubeka ukhangele intlungu yakho.
Gcina iingcamango zakho neemvakalelo zakho. Bamkele kwaye ube nomusa kuwe ngokuba nabo. Akuncedi ukuzenza ngathi ulungile xa ungaphantsi, ungesabi, okanye usizi. Akumele uxoke ngamanga.
Unokulila. Unokukhalaza. Unokulila. Oku kukukunceda uqhubeke, wenze okusemgangathweni kwimeko, kwaye ujabulele ubomi.
Kuyinto engokwemvelo ukuzibuza malunga nokuba bekuphi Ukulangazelela umntwana onempilo amaphupha akho okanye ubomi obunjani wena kunye nosapho lwakho unokunyamezela. Kufuneka ufunde ukuhlala kunye nokulangazelela, kwaye unokwenza oko, kodwa akudingeki uxoxe nawe malunga nokuba kunzima kangakanani oku.
Okwesibini, zama ukuzamkela ngokwakho- unomusa nothando owenza okusemandleni akho kunye nomntanakho onokungathandabuzeki ukwenza okusemandleni akhe phantsi kweemeko ezinzima.
Ekugqibeleni, ukwamukela intlungu yethu kunye nathi kukhokelela ekubeni samkele kwaye sinandiphe umntwana wethu kunye nosapho.
Le yindlela yokuthanda nokuzonwabisa. Uxhumo olujulileyo umzali ovakalelwa ngalo usana olutsha, okanye amanyathelo okuqala omntwana, okanye amagama okuqala anokuvakalelwa nanoma yimuphi umzuzu xa sisazi ngokwenene kwaye sifunene nomntwana wethu. Ukuba uxhumano olunzulu luhlala ngaphakathi kuwe. Njengoko ubuyisela kwakhona, unokwenene ulonwabo olunzulu. Oko akuthethi ukuba ubomi bakho buya kuba lula. Kodwa iyavuya kwaye iphumelele.
URobert Naseef, Ph.D., kunye noCindy Ariel, i-Ph.D., ngabahleli abaququzeleli be "Iimvo ezivela kwi-Spectrum: Abazali, oogogo nomkhulu, abazalwana, abantu abane-Autism, kunye nabaSebenzi Belana Ubulumko Babo" (2006). Kwiwebhu kwiiNketho ezingezinye.