Ukuba awuzange ufumane ukufa komntwana, kunzima kakhulu ukwazi ukuba ungathini kumntu ojongene nale hlobo lokulahleka. Ukufa komntwana akuqhelekanga, kungabulungisa kwaye kuyingozi. Kungokwemvelo ukuba ngabahlobo babazali abalilayo bafune ukufikelela kwaye bancede, kodwa kunjalo, bezama ukufumana amagama afanelekileyo okuthetha ngenxa yokuba oko utshoyo-noko ungenakho-kunokuchaphazela kakhulu umntu osweleyo.
Kuthetha ntoni xa umntu elahlekelwe ngumntwana
Abazali abaye balahlekelwa ngumntwana bafuna ukuziva bexhaswa entlungu yabo kwaye bafumana imvume yokukhalazela ngendlela yabo. Bamele bazive ngathi ubomi bomntwana babo bubaluleke kakhulu kwaye bathetha okuthile kwabanye ababebazi kunye nokumthanda. Unokuhlangabezana neemfuno zomzali onomvandalo ngokugcina oku kulandelayo engqondweni:
- Ukunikezela ngenyameko yoxolo. "Ndiyaxolisa ngokulahlekelwa kwakho," ngumzekelo omhle.
- Ukunikezela ngenkxaso evulekile. "Ukuba kukho into endiyenzayo, nceda ndixelele. Ndikulungele ukunceda nangayiphi indlela."
- Ukuthula. Musa ukuziva ngathi ufuna ukuzalisa izithuba ezingenanto ngokuthetha. Yenza ukhululekile ngokuthula kwaye ube ngumzimba onomzali onesihlwili.
- Xa ixesha lichanekile, cacisa oko umntwana okufayo akubhekise kuwe. Oku kungenakulungele ukwenza ngokukhawuleza emva kokufa komntwana kodwa, xa ixesha lichanekile, linokubonisa ukuba luncedo kakhulu kumzali (okanye) ukuva abanye bevakalisa oko umntwana ofileyo akubhekise kuye. Unako kwakhona ukwabelana ngememori eyintandokazi okanye ezimbini ukuze wenze ukuba ube ngumntu.
Into engayithandiyo xa umntu elahlekelwe ngumntwana
Ngokulinganayo njengoko kubalulekile ukuba uthini oko akuthethi , njengale:
- Ungalokothi utsho ukuba uyazi njani umzali oshonelwe.
- Ungalokothi uthi, "Ewe, bekumele kube yinto engcono," okanye "Kwakuyintando kaThixo." Ukuzama ukuqonda ukulahleka ngale ndlela kungenza abazali ababuhlungu bazive ngathi unciphisa ukufa kwabantwana babo.
- Ungalokothi uthi, "Uhlala kwindawo engcono ngoku." Oku kunokukuthuthuzela ukuba ukholelwa ezulwini, kodwa kungenako ukunika induduzo kumzali osizileyo, ohlala kwindawo ephakamileyo kakhulu emhlabeni.
- Ungalokothi uphazamise ibali lomthandayo ngokuxelela ibali lakho. Eli lixesha labo lokulila ukuze ugcine ugxila kubo.
- Ungalokothi ukhankanye ixesha lokudabuka okanye izigaba zentlungu . Intlungu ayilandelanga umgca okanye ihamba kwiinqanaba eziqikelelweyo.
Gcina iNkxaso
Gcina ukhumbule ukuba umntu olahlekelwa ngumntwana akayi kuphinda abuyele "ngokuqhelekileyo" kwaye akaze 'aphumelele.' Ukulahlekelwa ngumntwana kuguqula umntu ubomi bakhe bonke. Ngenxa yoko, umele uthande kwaye uxhase umhlobo wakho osweleyo okanye umthandayo ngenxa yokuba ngubani kunye nabo abaya kubakho njengoko elungisa ukulahlekelwa ngumntwana.