Xa ufunda ukuba umhlobo osondeleyo okanye ilungu lentsapho lifumene ukuba unesimo esibi okanye esibulalayo, kuyinto engokwemvelo ukuzibuza ngezinto onokuthetha okanye ukwenza ukuze uncede. Kungokwemvelo ukuba uzive ungenalo ithemba okanye ungakufaneleki.
Unokwenza umehluko njengoko wakho othandekayo ebhekene neentsuku zakhe zokugqibela. Iimfuno zabantu bonke zihlukile.
Kuye kuwe ukuba uvelele kumhlobo okanye iimfuno zesimo sengqondo. Abanye abantu abajamelana neengxaki ezinzima bangadinga amathuba okuba baveze iimvakalelo zabo, ngelixa abanye baya kuqonda ingxoxo "evamile" kunye nokusebenzisana. Abantu abaninzi abajamelana nesifo esibi baya kufumana kunzima ukuchitha ixesha elide nabanye, ngenxa yokuba kunokukhawuleza.
Zama enye okanye ngaphezulu kweendlela ezine eziwusizo.
Ukuxhalabisa
Ukuvumela umhlobo wakho okanye umthandayo ukuba wazi ukucinga ngaye kwaye uxhalabele impilo yakhe inceda. Kukho umgca ococekileyo, nangona kunjalo, phakathi kokubonisa ukukhathazeka okwaneleyo nokubonisa ukukhathazeka ngokweqile okanye ukungazinzi. Ukuthetha into elula ngathi "Oku kufuneka kube nzima kuwe" okanye "Yintoni endiyenzayo ukunceda kuwe?" Ibonisa inkxalabo yakho kunye nenkxaso yakho, ngoxa uthi "Ziziphi iingxaki oza kuzenza" zikhuthaza ukucinga kugula.
Qaphela, kwakhona, ukuphepha ukuvakalisa ukukhathazeka okukhulu-okuvezwe ngendlela ejolise ekuziphatheni-ukuba umhlobo wakho ogulayo okanye ilungu lentsapho ligxininise ukuzama ukunyamekela! Umzekelo, esithi "Ndiya kwenza ntoni ngaphandle kwakho?" ngokusemthethweni ucela induduzo, okuphambene nokunikezela induduzo.
Yiba Ngokwempilo Ngoku
Ukubonakaliswa ngokusemzimbeni kuthetha ukuphela nje, kumntu. Akufuneki ukuba uzalise ixesha kunye nomthandayo othethayo okanye owenza imisebenzi yansuku zonke. Ukwazi nje ukuba ukhona kunokumnceda ukuba azive esithandwa kwaye wamkelekile, njengokuba kunjalo. Ngokuxhomekeka kwimeko, unokufuna ukubukela ifilimu oyintandokazi ndawonye, ncokola ngeziganeko eziqhelekileyo zemihla, okanye uvele uphume. Ukuba khona kukho indlela yokuqinisekisa ukuba umntu ofa uyaziva enakekelwa kwaye ebalulekileyo.
Ukufikelela kwi-Acceptance Calm
Enye yezona zinto ezincinci unokuzenza kumntu wakho othandekayo kukuqhubeka phantsi kwendlela yokukhanyela xa sele esamkele ukuhlala kwakhe ngokomzimba okanye ukufa okuzayo. Unokulingwa ukuba uthethe izinto ezinjengokuthi "Musa ukuyeka!" Okanye "Awuyi kukuvumela ukuba le nto ikubethe, akunjalo?" Nangona iinjongo ezintle, ezi ntetho azibonisi wakho umthandayo kwamkelwa .
Xa udibana nomntu owamthandayo ngokukhawuleza apho ekhona kwinqanaba lakhe lokumkela, umnika imvume yokuziva ukuba ufuna ukuziva njani kwaye umenze amazi ukuba uyamthanda kwaye uyamxhasa njengoko nje.
Ukunika Uncedo Olusebenzayo
Mhlawumbi ufuna ukwenza into ebonakalayo inceda umntu wakho othandekayo ngendlela ecacileyo-into evelisa iziphumo.
Ukunikela ukumnceda ngezinto eziphathekayo. Yenza iimpahla zakhe zokuhlamba, uhlambulule indlu yakhe, ugijime iinqwelo zakhe, mthabathe kwiindawo zokutyunjwa kwezokwelapha. Uya kuxabisa uncedo kwaye wazi ukuba unenkathalo yokwenza ixesha elixakekileyo lokumxhasa. Okona kubaluleke ngakumbi, kwezinye iimeko, kunika uncedo nenkxaso kwintsapho yomntu ofa-kaninzi ngendlela yokulungiswa kweenkonzo zokutya, ukukhetha ukutya, ukuphendula i-imeyile, kunye nokunye ukuncedisa ukunyamekela iimfuno zemihla ngemihla ezinokubangela uxinzelelo okanye nzima.