Ukufa kusenza sikhululeke kwaye kusoloko kusishiya ukulahlekelwa ngamazwi ngaphambili, ngexesha okanye emva komngcwabo okanye inkonzo yesikhumbuzo. Ngezantsi, uzakufumana iintetho ezintathu zentsingiselo eziphakanyisayo zokunceda uvakalise ngokuqinisekileyo izikhalazo zakho kwaye unikezele intuthuzelo ngokwenene kumntu osizileyo ngenxa yokufa kwesihlobo okanye umhlobo.
Yintoni Endiyithandayo Ngayo?
Ngelishwa, ininzi yentembelelo ibonisa abantu ngokubanzi ngaphambili, ngexesha okanye emva komngcwabo okanye inkonzo yesikhumbuzo - njengokuthi "Ndiyaxolisa ngenxa yokulahleka kwakho," "Uhlala kwindawo engcono," "Ixesha liphilisa onke amanxeba" kunye nezinye izinto Amagama alolu hlobo - anikeze umntwana osweleyo ngendlela yokududuzeka okunentsingiselo (kwaye unokubonakalisa enganelisekanga).
Iingxelo zolu hlobo azifunanga impendulo kwaye, ngoko ke, ngokuphindaphindiweyo kwenza nje umntu owanikezela ukuba azive ngcono ngenxa yokuthi "into" kwaye anqobe ubunzima obuvelayo xa sijongene nokufa.
Ukongezelela, iimpendulo eziphelileyo ezifana nale nto zingakwazi ukudala ukuba umntu oshonelwe akufanele akhulume ngomntu oshonile ngenxa yokuba akukho mntu ufuna ukuba naye kwaye kufuneka "aqhubeke" ngokukhawuleza.
Nangona ngokuqhelekileyo akufanelekile ukubuza xa emile kumgca wokufumana kumngcwabo wakhe / ukuhanjelwa , ukucela umntu onesiliva ukuba abelane ngeengcamango zakhe, iimvakalelo kunye neenkumbulo malunga nomntu ofileyo ngexesha elifanelekileyo unokubonisa ubungqina be-cathartic. Ukufa kuphelisa ubomi, kungekhona ubudlelwane, kwaye abo bajamelana nokulahlekelwa ngonaphakade komntu osondeleyo baya kwamkela ithuba lokuba baxoxe ngokukhululekileyo iimvakalelo zabo kunye neenkumbulo nomphulaphuli onomdla, onesihawu-nangona ukwenza njalo kubangela iinyembezi ezimbalwa.
Ndiyakuthanda
Nangona ziqukethe amagama amathathu amancinci, ezimbalwa ezinye iingxelo kwiimbali zabantu zikwazi ukuchaphazela ngokukodwa iimvakalelo kunye nekamva elizayo lomntu, isibini okanye iintlanga zonke. Amandla athi "Ndiyakuthanda" ahlala ngokusisigxina kwizinto zonke ezingatshoyo kodwa ngokucacileyo kwibinzana ngokwayo kunye nendlela esiyiqonda ngayo intsingiselo yayo, njengokuthi, "Ndiyakuxabisa ngaphezu kwazo zonke ezinye," "Ulonwabo lwakho lubaluleke kum," " hayi "kwaye" ndilapha ngenxa yenu "(phakathi kwezinye iinguqu kunye nokutolika).
Ngenxa yokuba abantu baninzi baziva behlaselwe yintlungu, ukuva ukuba "ndiyakuthanda" kunokunika isikhumbuzo esifanelekileyo, esilungileyo sokuthi akafanele abe yedwa yedwa ngeli xesha elinzima kwaye umntu unomdla ngonwabo kwaye ulungele ukukhuphaza kwaye inkxaso kwiintsuku, iiveki kunye neenyanga ezizayo.
Yeka amazwi ngokupheleleyo
Abantu abaninzi banzima ukufumana "amagama apheleleyo" kuthetha kumntu osiziwayo ukufa komntu othandekayo njengokungathi kukho inqaku lomlingo okanye ibinzana elinokuthi lucime intlungu yelahleko kwaye yenza imihla, iiveki kunye neenyanga zilula. Noko ke, inyaniso kukuba intlungu ayizange ibuhlungu kwaye, ngokugqithiseleyo, abasweleyo abayi kukhumbula kamva nantoni na ekuthethileyo ekufeni nasekungcwabeni. (Musa ukuyithatha!)
Oko ngokuqinisekileyo uya ku thu thuzela ngeli xesha elinzima, nangona kunjalo, kwaye mhlawumbi unokukhumbuza, kukubonakalisa okungenasiphelo, ukubonakalisa, ukunyamekela nothando. Gcina isandla sakhe; kunika ukufudumala; nikela iisuncu okanye i-handkerchief ecocekileyo xa kuyimfuneko; umkhangele emehlweni ekudluliseni iimvakalelo zakho ezingenangqondo; ukuphumla isandla kwisandla sakhe okanye kwigxala, okanye ukuvumela ukuba ukhale ngokukhululekile okanye ufumane usizi nentlungu ozivelayo.
Ukufa kungunaphakade kwaye kubangela ukuba kunzima okwenzakalayo, okwenzakalayo okuthatha ixesha lokuba abafelwayo bamkele kwaye badibanise ebomini babo phambili. Yithemba ukuba kuya kuba nexesha elingaphambili lokuthetha kwaye, ngoku ngoku, nikela isipho esixabisekileyo sokuqonda kwakho, ukuxhaswa kunye nobukho bobuhlungu.