Iimpazamo zonyango, izigulane ezithintekayo, ukulahlwa kweNkathalo kunye neziganeko ezimbi
Xa ufumana impazamo yezokwelapha okanye umpazamo, okanye udibana nomboneleli okhukhumelayo , okanye uhlala kwindawo yokuhlala esibhedlele esicatshukisayo-nayiphi na ingxaki edala ibali - ngoko ufuna ukuxelela ibali kumntu ozimisele ukuphulaphula aze amangaliswe, abe novelwano, kwaye novelwano.
Kuyavunywa, kukho ezinye iindaba ezixhalabeleyo zezempilo esesabayo zokwabelana ngazo. Mhlawumbi sinoyiko lohlobo oluthile lokubuyisela ("Ukuba ugqirha uyazi ukuba ndathetha ezo zinto ngaye, akanako ukungiphatha kakuhle").
Okanye, amabali athile ahlazo ("Andifuni ukuba nabani nazi ukuba ndine-STD, ngoko ndandiyilungele ukuxelela ukuba ugqirha wandithuka"). Kodwa ngenxa yamabali ethu amaninzi, sifuna nje ukuwagxotha esifuba sethu.
Iinzuzo zokukwabelana ngeNdaba Yakho yoNyango olubi
Njengabantu, ukwabelana ngamabali ethu kunokuba negalelo kwintlalo yethu. Abaninzi bethu baziva bekhathalele xa abahlobo bethu besabelana nathi kwaye besichukumisa nathi. Ukongezelela, kukho inani elithile le-catharsis ekuchazeni. Kwimeko yam, ndibe nomsindo xa ndandidlulile i-odyssey ye-medical misdiagnosis, ukuba ukwabelana kwam ibali kwam kwandinceda ndenze umsindo wam . Abanye basenokukwazi ukukrokraza ukulila kwabo okanye ukudabuka kwabo ngokwabelana. Okanye, njengoko i-Gramma yayisetyenziselwa ukuthi, "Inkathazo eyabelana ngayo ingxaki inomlinganiselo."
Kwakhona kunokwenzeka ukuphucula ubomi bakho ngokusebenzisa ibali lakho. Abanye abantu bayaqonda ukuba amabali abo baye badala iqonga ukuze bancede abanye.
Ndibiza abo bantu Abasindileyo abaSebenzayo kuba basebenzisa amava abo ukuze banqande iimeko ezibuhlungu abazibonela kwabanye. Ngelixa amabali ngokwawo angayi kuphinda aphucule iimeko ezibangelwa zona, ubomi babo bathatha inzondo entsha kunye nengqiqo ngenxa yendlela abakhetha ukuyinyamezela ngayo.
Umngcipheko wokuXhatshazwa kweNdaba Yakho yezoTywala
Ukulumkisa kuphela malunga nokubaliswa kwamabali kukuba kukho ingxaki apho ingaba yingozi kwimpilo yethu yengqondo. Intukuthelo, ukudabuka, nentlungu ziphendulela kwiimeko ezimbi kunye neziganeko ezimbi. Ukwabelana nabo emva kokuba inyaniso iyanceda nje kuphela xa kunceda ukuphilisa. Kodwa ukuhlala ngaphaya kwendawo ethile, eyahlukileyo kumntu wonke, ingaba ngumdaka kangangokuba uqala ukungena endleleni yokuphilisa. Uya kukwazi ukuba ufikelele kule nqanaba ukuba ngabahlobo bakho kunye nentsapho yakho ibonakala ikukhusela (abafuni ukuyiva kwakhona), okanye xa iinyanga okanye iminyaka idlule kwaye ibali lakho liyaqhubeka liyinto yokuqala xa uvuka ekuseni. Yiloo nto apho uzakufuna uncedo lwezakhono ukuze uphumelele ibali lakho kwaye uqale ukuphucula indlela obheka ngayo ubomi.
Izikhokelo Zokunika Iindaba Zakho ZoNyango Olubi
Abathengisi bamabali abahlakaniphile bayazi oku kulandelayo:
- Baxelela amabali abo kanye kuphela ngomphulaphuli. Bayazi ukuba ukuphindaphinda ibali elifanayo ngokuphindaphindiweyo kumntu ofanayo kunokwenene ukudala umqobo kumtshato, kwaye akuphuculanga imeko ngokwayo.
- Baxelela amabali abo ngokufutshane , besithi kuphela iinkcukacha ezibalulekileyo nezifanelekileyo, bengabambeleli abanye "ukubamba umkhosi" ngelixa behamba phambili. Bayazi ukuba abaphulaphuli bayakuxabisa ubukhulu xa beqonda ubunzima beemeko. Ukuba umphulaphuli ufuna iinkcukacha ezingaphezulu, baya kuzicela.
- Batshela amabali abo ngokucacileyo kwaye musa ukuwafakela ukuba bawenze bebuhlungu ngaphezu kwabo. Kucacile, imvakalelo iya kuba yinxalenye yebali, kodwa ukwenza imvakalelo inxalenye ebalulekileyo yebali ayibakhonze abanye, yindlela nje yokuzisebenzisa.
- Baxelela amabali abo ngamaxesha afanelekileyo , musa ukuphazamisa amabali abanye, kwaye ungazami ukuba "unye-up" ngokuzama ukwenza ibali labo likhangele ngakumbi kunomnye umntu. Amabali akufanele asetyenziswe ukuthelekisa amanqanaba ombi; kufuneka basetyenziswe ukunceda abanye baqonde.
- Abasebenzisi amabali abo njengezizathu zokuzimela . Imeko ngokwayo ingaba yisisusa. Ngokomzekelo, emva kokubanjelwa kwesibhedlele esifumene nesifo, umntu unokuphosa iiveki zomsebenzi-oko kuqiqa. Kodwa akukho sizathu sokusebenzisa ibali ngokwayo ukuba lingene endleleni yexanduva. Ngokomzekelo, ngenxa yokuba ungehlolwe kakuhle akuthethi ukuba awukwazi ukuqhuba i-carpool kule veki.
- Basebenzisa amabali abo ukuze bancede abanye kwaye bagxininise kwingeniso abaya kuyo kumphulaphuli - imiba "yezilumkiso", kungekhona "ukuziva uxolo kum". Ukuthetha ngokuzikhukhumeza ugqirha kunokunxusa abanye ukuba bangayisebenzisi loo dokotela. Ukuthetha ngokufumana isifo esibhedlele kuya kunceda abanye baqaphele xa nabo bebhedlele.
Kuphi Iimbali Zogulane Ngeziganeko Zonyango Ezibi?
Ukwabelana ngeendaba Ngomntu: Igama lomlomo lihlala linamandla kakhulu. Ingaba incoko yodwa-inye inayo, okanye ungoqela loxhasayo lomntu, ukwabelana ngebali lakho akuvumelekanga nje ukuba inyaniso, kodwa iimvakalelo eziza kuzisa, nazo.
Umsindo okanye iVidiyo: Unokucinga ukuxelela ibali lakho kwividiyo okanye kwifashoni yomsindo, uze uyilayishe kwi-YouTube okanye iVimeo (ividiyo) okanye iTunes okanye i-Hipcast (isandi.)
Ukwabelana ngeendaba ekubhaliseni
- Nangona abanye bethu bathanda ukubhala kwiphepha, abanye bathanda ukupapasha amabali ethu kwi-intanethi, okanye kwincwadi okanye kumaphephancwadi. Abaninzi bethu baye bafumanisa ukuba ukubhala nje iinyaniso kunye neemvakalelo malunga nokuhlupheka kwethu yi-cathartic. Nazi ezinye iindlela kunye neendawo ongabhala ngayo ibali lakho:
- Amaqela enkxaso ye-intanethi , emele zonke izifo okanye imeko, ziyafumaneka ukuze uthathe inxaxheba. Ukuba loo ndawo ihambelana neemeko zakho, kuya kubakho abantu abaninzi abalindele ukuba wabelane.
- Ukuba ungumntu osindileyo, cinga ukuqala iblogi malunga namava akho ukuze uncede abanye.
- Bhala incwadi. Ihlabathi lokushicilela litshintshile ngokuphawulekayo kwiminyaka embalwa edlulileyo, kwaye ngoku kulula ukuba ubhale kwaye uzishicilele incwadi yakho-eyinyani, ikhava kunye nayo yonke-ingenangqiqo, okanye ikhululekile.
- Iziza zokuphononongwa ngogqirha zinokukunceda kwezinye izigulane ukuba uhlolo luyenziwa ngokuchanekileyo nangenyaniso. Funda kabanzi malunga nokubhala izibuyekezo kumaziko okuphonononga ugqirha .
- Ukuba ufuna ukushicilela ibali lakho kwi-intanethi kwiindawo ezikhoyo ezamkela amabali malunga neephene zezokwelapha ezimbi izigulane, qwalasela oku kulandelayo:
Umanyano wabathengi: Yabelana ngeNdaba yeZiphumo zonyango
- Ulungelelwaniso lweMguli oMandla: Bika iSiganeko esibi
- Pro Publica (Inhlangano yeendaba): ikucela ukuba wabelane ngebali lakho kwi-Facebook