Cinga le miba ephambili xa ujongene nalo mbuzo onzima
Xa umntu othandekayo efa, abazali nabagcini bahlala bebuza ukuba ngaba abantwana kunye / okanye abantwana abancinci bafanele ukuba baye kumngcwabo olandelayo, umkhumbuzo kunye / okanye umngcwabo obanjelwe umfi, okanye ukuba abantwana bahlale ekhaya kunye nomntwana okanye endlwini yommelwane okanye umhlobo.
Ngokuqondakalayo kukhuthazwa ngumnqweno wokukhusela abantwana kwiimeko eziphazamisayo, zengqondo, ngokubanzi, abazali nabagcini banokuzibuza ukuba umntwana wabo usemncinci ukuba aqonde ukuba kwenzekani, okanye akhathazeke ukuba iinkonzo ziya kubangela ukwesaba ngokufa nokufa emva koko.
Ngelishwa, ayikho into elula, ubukhulu obufanayo-yonke impendulo kule ngxaki, kodwa eli nqaku linika izinto ezininzi ezibalulekileyo omele uziqwalasele kukukunceda ukuba uthathe isigqibo sokuba ingaba umntwana okanye umntwana kufuneka ahambe emngcwabeni, kwisikhumbuzo kunye / okanye kwinkonzo yokungcwaba.
Umntwana
Inkolelo ezininzi malunga neemfuno zabantwana abalilayo zikhona, kwaye inkulu phakathi kwezi zinto kukuba ubudala bokuba umntwana ufanele ukuba aye kumngcwabo, isikhumbuzo kunye / okanye ukungcwaba. Ngokutsho kwezi ngqungquthela, iintsana kunye nabantwana abangaphantsi kweminyaka ethile (ngokuqhelekileyo malunga neminyaka emithathu okanye emine ubudala, kodwa kungekhona kuphela) akufanele bahambe kwiintlanganiso zokungena ngenxa yokuba bancinci kakhulu ukuba baqonde intsingiselo yale nkonzo, ababuhlungu, okanye, ngenxa yobudala babo, abazange benze isinamathiselo esinomdla kumntu ofileyo kwaye ke akukho mfuneko yokuba khona.
Ukunyaniseka kukuba iminyaka yobudala akufanele ifune ukuba ahambe kumngcwabo, isikhumbuzo kunye / okanye ingcwaba.
Ukudala i-absolutes based based on age chronologic nje ngokuba budenge ngokuthi "bonke abaselula bayaphikisana" okanye ukuba "bephuzile ukutshata" emva kwento ethile ebomini. Esikhundleni sokusekela isigqibo sakho malunga nobudala bomntwana, qwalasela ezinye izinto ezibhalwe kweli nqaku kwaye wenze isigqibo esinolwazi.
Ngaba Abazali Bajamelana Njani?
Ukukhulisa umntwana ngumsebenzi wexesha elizeleyo kwaye kunokuba ngumngeni kubazali okanye ngabagcini bokuba phantsi kweemeko ezifanelekileyo. Xa kubakho ukufa-ngakumbi xa kubandakanya ilungu lentsapho, ukuba ngumzali okanye umntakwabo-intlungu kunye nentlungu, kungekhona ukukhankanya iinkcukacha ezininzi ezibandakanya ukucwangcisa umngcwabo, isikhumbuzo kunye / okanye ukungcwaba, unokuziva unzima. Ngekubeni kubalulekile ukuqwalasela isimo sengqondo somzali okanye umgcini xa unquma ukuba umntwana okanye umntwana kufuneka ahambe, le yedwa akufanele ifune ukuba abe khona enkonzweni.
Nangona kunokuba uzive kulula ukuba ulungiselele umntwana okanye ucele ummelwane ukuba abukele umntwana wakho ngexesha leenkonzo, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba unamathuba amaninzi anceda umntwana okanye umntwana ukuba abe khona ngaphandle kokubeka iimfuno ezinkulu . Okokuqala, abazali okanye abagadi banokulungiselela ukuba ilungu lentsapho, umhlobo okanye nokuba ilungu lomngcwabo abasebenzi basekhaya ukuba bakhonze njengomngane wakho wengcwaba ngexesha lokungcwaba, isikhumbuzo kunye / okanye ukungcwaba. Ufanele ulungele ukuhlala kunye nonyana wakho okanye intombi yakho yonke ixesha kwaye uphendule nayiphi na imibuzo engayenza umntwana wakho, kunye nokuphakamisa imisebenzi ethile ehleliweyo ukuba / xa ixesha lenkathalo yengane lidlulayo.
Ukongezelela, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba umntwana wakho okanye umntwana akudingeki ukuba aye kwiinkonzo ixesha lonke. Umzekelo, ukuya kwiyure yokuqala yokuvuswa / ukuhanjelwa, okanye umngcwabo kodwa kungengcwaba, mhlawumbi uhamba ekhaya okanye uphume ukutya kunye nelungu lentsapho elithembekileyo okanye umhlobo kunceda umntwana wakho athathe inxaxheba ngaphandle kokubeka uxinzelelo olungapheliyo kunye noxinzelelo ngokwakho.
Yintoni Eyifunayo Umntwana?
Nangona kubonakala kungenakuphikisa, ngezinye iinkqubo indlela efanelekileyo kakhulu yokufumanisa ukuba umntwana ufanele ahambe emngcwabeni, isikhumbuzo kunye / okanye ukumbelwa kungumceli ngokumcela ngqo.
Ukuze uncede unyana okanye intombi yakho enze isigqibo, kufuneka ulungele ukumchazela oko kuza kwenzeka kwiinkonzo kunye nenjongo emva kwezi mithendeleko kunye / okanye iinkqubo.
Kwakhona kubalulekile ukulungiselela umntwana wakho ngeempendulo zengqondo zabanye abaye. Imingcwabo, ukungcwaba, kunye neenkonzo zesikhumbuzo ziphakathi kweemeko ezimbalwa apho kusenokwamkeleka kuluntu ukukhala nokubonisa intlungu ebantwini. Ukubona amalungu osapho kunye nabahlobo kulo mxholo omtsha kunokubakhokisayo, nangona kunjalo, ke kukulungele ukulungiselela umntwana wakho oko angabhekana nayo.
Ngokuxhomekeke kwiminyaka yengane yakho kunye nenqanaba lakhe lokukhula, le ngxoxo mhlawumbi iya kubangela "eminye imibuzo ebalulekileyo," njengokuba kutheni abantu befa, bahamba phi, njl., Kufuneka ulungele ukuphendula ezi mibuzo, ngokunjalo. Ngokubanzi, ufanele uphendule nayiphi na imibuzo umntwana wakho abuza ngokuthe ngqo kwaye ngokunyanisekileyo, ngaphandle kokusebenzisa izibhamu .
Ukuba unyana wakho okanye intombi yakho ikhetha ukungena emngcwabeni, isikhumbuzo kunye / okanye inkonzo yokungcwaba, kubalulekile ukuba ungamgxeka umntwana wakho. Ukuba kuyimfuneko, usenokumqinisekisa ukuba ukungena kwiinkonzo akuthethi ukuba akayithandi umfi, kwaye ukuba ukuhamba akuyona indlela yodwa yokuthetha umntu othandayo.
Usenako ukugqiba?
Ukuba usalokhu ungaqinisekanga emva kokuqwalasela ngokucokisekileyo imiba engentla, ngoko umntwana wakho kufuneka ukuba abe khona emngcwabeni, isikhumbuzo kunye / okanye ukungcwaba nje xa kwenzeka oko kubonakala kubalulekile kuye kamva ebomini. Intsha eninzi kunye nabantu abadala baziva bezisola, benetyala okanye benomsindo ngenxa yokuba bengabandakanywa kwinkonzo njengomntwana kwaye babengenalo ithuba lokuthetha umhlobo wabo. Kwezinye iimeko, abantu bakholelwa ukuba ukulahleka emngcwabeni, isikhumbuzo okanye ukungcwaba xa beselula banokuchaphazeleka ukukwazi ukukhalazela ngokuqhelekileyo kwimva kamva.
Oko kwathiwa, akufanele umphoqele umntwana wakho ukuba aye kwinkonzo ukuba akafuni ukuba khona. Ukufuna ukuhamba komntwana kunokudala iimvakalelo. Njengoko kuphawuliwe ekuqaleni kwesi nqaku, akukho mpendulo ecacileyo kulo mbuzo.
> Imithombo
"Ngaba abantwana abaselula baya emangcwabeni?" ngo-Kate Hilpern, ngoJulayi 12, 2013. I-Guardian . Ukubuyiselwa ngo-Apreli 27, 2014. http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2013/jul/12/kufuneka-u-