Umbuzo: Ndingathini Umzali ongumntwana omdala onomntu ongu-Asperger Syndrome
Umntwana wam oneminyaka engama-22 ubudala u-Asperger Syndrome. Unengqiqo kwaye wenza kakuhle kwiikholeji-kodwa unesizungu. Udibene nomfazi osemntanini ofuna ukuba ahambe eKalifornia, kwaye ndiyesaba ukukhusela kwakhe. Uyakhathazeka ngokuhamba kwaye ukholelwa ukuba "abahlobo" bamlindele. Ndingamnceda njani ukuba abone ukuba angena enkingeni?
Impendulo: Kwiimeko ezinje, ngelanga kubonakala ngathi unamava ngutitshala ongcono. Ndiyabona amacala omabini: ukuba abazali baqinisekisa ukuba umntwana wenza iphutha eliyingozi kwaye ufuna ukwenza nantoni na ukuyikhusela; kunye nentombazana engazange ihlangabezane nayo kodwa yedwa kwaye inqatshelwe ubomi bakhe kwaye ekugqibeleni ikholelwa ukuba inelungelo lokwenza yedwa kwaye ifumana ubuhlobo kunye nothando. Akunakwenzeka ukuba akholelwe kumaphupha akhe, kwaye ungonakalisa ulwalamano lwakho kunye naye xa unqabisa kakhulu.
Ngaba ungambuza imibuzo emalunga nobudlelwane? Kwimizuzu emingakanani eyamhlangabeza yona, yintoni inomdla wakhe, yintoni into ayithandayo kakhulu ngaye, zeziphi izicwangciso zakhe xa efika eCalifornia, yintoni imbono yakhe yobudlelwane obuhle .... Imibuzo ekhohlisayo xa kunokwenzeka ukulinganisa ukuba unjani na owaziyo ngaye kunye nokuba unzulu kangakanani, kwaye luphi ulwalamano olubhekiselele kuye.
Ukuba livakala kakhulu kwaye livumelekile, unako ukukhululeka; ukuba akunjalo, unokuthembela ngokunyanisekileyo kwindlela efanelekileyo. Enye into ongayenza umvumele ukuba ahambe, kodwa zama ukumfumana ukuba uthembele ukuba uya kubiza i-X inani lamaxesha ngosuku, fumana ulwazi olunxibelelwano njengoko unakho-inombolo yakhe yefowuni kunye nedilesi, uhambo lwakhe, njl.
Ndicinga ukuba ukuba unokufumana impumelelo yentlalo, mhlawumbi akayi kulungela ukuxosha le nyamakazi kwenye inxweme. Kwaye ukudibana nabanye abantu kwi-spectrum ngamaqela enkxaso kunokumnika loo nto. Kodwa unakho okanye akanakunomdla ekufundeni malunga no-Asperger kunye nokuhlangana nabanye abantu abanalo.
Ndiyathanda ukuba ndiyakunikela into enokuyenza. Ukuba uya kuhamba, zama nje ukumlungiselela ukuba kwenzeke ukuba akunakusebenza ngendlela ecinga ngayo. Mxelele ukuba ubudlelwane kuthatha ixesha kwaye akusoloko kusebenza; Into ebaluleke kakhulu ongayenzayo, ngokwenene, akuyikumxhatshaza ukuze angabi nxolongo ukuba abuyele ekhaya ukuba izinto zihlukane. Mcacise ukuba uyamthanda kwaye uya kumxhasa kungakhathaliseki ukuba wenza ntoni, kwaye uya kumnceda nangayiphi na indlela onokuyenza kwaye uhlala ehlala ekhaya. Ngethemba, uya kwandisa amaphiko akhe kancane kwaye ugcine imigca yonxibelelwano evulekile nawe. Mfake umnxeba xa engenayo enye.